Welcome back to Girl Talk Tuesday! If you missed my first installment of GTT, check it out here. It was my most commented blog post I’ve ever written. I received so much amazing feedback from my Gorgeous Girls not only on the post itself, but everywhere from SnapChat to Facebook. Thanks so much for the love and comments! Today, we’re taking a different route and talking about habits of successful women.
My apologies for missing last Tuesday. Matt & I were in NYC for Comic Con as well as press for his new NBC show, Timeless. You may have caught a very terrified me on the Today Show with Kathie Lee & Hoda? I had no idea they would call me on stage and you could probably tell that by my face, lol! I’m a huge fan of theirs and they were so incredibly sweet to us. ♥
In my adult life, I’ve worn several different hats. I’ve been a college student, a career woman (I worked as a fraud investigator) and now I’m an entrepreneur. Regardless which category I have fit into since my early 20’s, I was always on the lookout to better myself to be more successful.
Let’s kick things off by first looking at the word success. According to the dictionary, the definition of success is: the accomplishment of an aim or purpose; the attainment of popularity or profit; a person or thing that achieves desired aims or attains prosperity.
But, I could ask 10,000 women what success means to them and potentially receive 10,000 different answers. We all are at different places in our lives with different goals we want to achieve. Success looks totally different for every woman. The good news? There are habits that successful women have that we can adopt to have a more successful day, career or maybe even life. Let’s take a look.
Habits of Successful Women
- Put their husbands and families first. Seems like a no-brainer, right? Maybe you have no problem with this, but I can almost guarantee you that you know someone who does. Women are hard workers. We like to get the job done and get it done right. We like to better ourselves and our careers, sometimes to the point of bringing work home with us both literally and emotionally. When this starts to happen, it’s as if we lose the ability to turn off our work-side. A truly balanced woman understands the importance of her career, but also understands the importance of her personal life. Work is where you achieve your goals, but home (with your husband and kids) is where you achieve your happiness.
- They get up & get dressed. If you work outside of your home, this will sound like a total duh to you. If you’re like me and you work from home, then this one is probably an ouchie. I love waking up in the morning, rolling out of bed and working all day in my jammies. Seems harmless, right? Well it sorta is. But it tends to keep you less motivated. When you wake up and get ready for your day as if you work outside of your home, you tend to be more motivated. I don’t know about you, but a motivated Angela can just about move mountains. When I’m in my PJs I tend to move slower and think slower because it’s almost as if I’m in a constant “relax mode.” Is this a totally mental thing? You betcha. Sometimes we have to trick ourselves into thinking and doing certain things. This is one of them for me.
- Understand the power of the word, “No.” This is one I’m still learning. Used together, those two letters form the most powerful word in the English language. This skill is one we need to learn and practice in all areas of our lies, not just in work situations. Have a friend or family member who keeps asking for favors that you don’t have the resources to provide? No. It’s time we stop overextending our time, our emotions and our finances at the risk of hurting someone else’s feelings. You can absolutely say no in a completely respectful and loving way (my Aunt Gina always says to be “Lovingly Firm”). I can’t guarantee that you won’t make someone angry… But we as women aren’t in the business of pleasing people. We are here to live our own lives and achieve our own goals. If we consistently put ourselves aside to put other’s tasks ahead of our own, we’ll just keep running in circles. Just to be clear, I’m not saying to always say no to every person. I’m talking about saying no to people and situations that will overwork, over-exert and over-stress YOU.
- Delegate. Another hard one for me, but oh-so-necessary. I once heard a story about a hardworking momma who said this to her loving husband: You can have a clean house, good food or a working wife. I can do two out of three. Which two will you choose? That’s a smart woman. She realized that she couldn’t do it all. She was upfront and honest with her husband about it and gave him the choice of which task she would delegate to someone else. Not all of us have the resources to do this, but I have a feeling there may be certain things in our lives (work and home) that we could delegate to someone else. Delegating helps maintain sanity in my opinion. Doing it all doesn’t make us look better if we’re pulling our hair out from the stress.
- Take care of their bodies. What’s the first thing you give up when you get overwhelmed in your life? I give up exercise and healthy eating. I feel like I just can’t make time to get to the gym. When I’m stressed, I don’t care what I put into my body as long as it’s quick. Here’s the problem with that: the busyness that we’re experiencing is momentary, we’re stuck with our bodies and our health for the rest of our lives. Neglecting our health now will only cause problems down the road. I’m preaching this one just as much for myself to hear as I am for anyone reading these words on the other side of this screen. This is a biggie. No one else will take care of us. We have to stop allowing everything else in our insane day to hinder our well-being.
- Feed their souls. This is another big one. I was recently talking to my best friend, who’s a busy mom of four, and asked when the last time she took an hour or two to herself to recharge. Guess what, she couldn’t remember. How about you? What do you do when your soul needs a rest? How do you recharge? When is the last time you did that for yourself? For me, feeding my soul is taking time to dive into my devotional, studying God’s Word and quiet time. There is literally never a time that I’ve done this and walked away regretting that time spent. It’s necessary. It’s also highly neglected by me. I have to be super intentional to keep this a priority, but guess what… When I do, I’m a much happier person for it.
- Set boundaries. Boundaries is an ugly word to a lot of people. They don’t know how to establish them, so they just don’t do it. This one falls very closely in line with #3. Boundaries don’t mean that you are an unfriendly person. They mean you have enough respect for yourself and other people to create healthy relationships. If you have a person in your life who sucks the life out of you, or maybe makes you feel incredibly uncomfortable, establishing boundaries with these individuals will protect you from future situations that absolutely do not have to occur.
- Let go of their insecurities. If you missed my first GTT, then go back and check it out now. Successful women set out to accomplish a goal, and then they go out and they do it. They don’t allow their insecurities to hold them back from what they want to accomplish. They know what they are capable of, so they make it happen. They believe in themselves. They recognize the gifts that God has blessed them with and they study, learn and work towards their dreams. They don’t allow naysayers to rule their lives. They know what they want and they don’t stop until they get it.
- Get their hair done. Sounds silly, I know. My dear friend, Julie Solomon, told me that she had a girlfriend call her, after giving birth to her son, and that girlfriend told her to hire a babysitter and get her butt to the salon. She did. She left the salon with her fresh locks and felt like a new woman. I know that feeling. I’ve passed similar advice on to some of my own mommy friends. This one is more of a metaphor, but I think you get where I’m going with it. When you’re feeling down on yourself, go out and do what it is that makes you feel like you. Maybe you’re like Charlotte in Sex & the City when she was pregnant and feeling crummy. She needed to do what made her feel like Charlotte: start running again. So you’re feeling beat down after a bad conversation with your boss, go home and take that bubble bath. Whatever it is that you indulge in that makes you feel fabulous, do it. Sometimes, we girls just need a good indulgence to feel like ourselves again.
- Make wise decisions. In all areas of life. Can’t afford that handbag? Then be wise enough to not buy it. Dieting but really what to overindulge? Be wise enough to recognize the guilt you’ll feel tomorrow. In an unhealthy dating relationship? Be wise enough to see that your future self won’t be any happier with this man that your current self knows you shouldn’t be dating. Be wise enough to stop and think about the decision you have to make, big or small. Wisdom is something we all want and need. If you’re like me, you get in a hurry and do whatever, because any decision at all is at least a decision made. Wrong way to handle things, ladies. Be slow to think, even slower to speak but quick to listen.
- Organize their day. Creating routines and scheduling your day will cut down stress tenfold. When I schedule my day and actually operate according to that schedule, my day is 100% more successful. Creating routines that make sense for your day takes out the daily decision making that is so unnecessary. Doing things like prepping your coffee and lunch the night before frees up time the next morning. Routines for house work, grocery shopping and laundry are also major game changers in my opinion. Being intentional with your time is so essential for success. You have 24 hours in your day, are you using them wisely?
A disclaimer to this post: if you are a stay-at-home wife or mom, you are absolutely not excluded from these tips. You work every bit as hard as women who are in the business world. Nothing makes me more angrier than to hear someone talk about housewives as though they sit around and eat bonbons all day watching soaps on tv. Moms, you have jobs too. In my opinion, you have the most fulfilling and rewarding job of all!
So tell me, what are some of your tips and tricks for a success? Leave a comment below! xo
What I’m Wearing: