How to Deal with Loneliness

How to Deal with Loneliness

150 150 Angela Lanter

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

Bailey 44 'Desert Sunset' Lace & Silk Chiffon Maxi Dress angela lanter hello Gorgeous

With our move to Vancouver, I now have a lot of time on my hands.  Not so much, “free time” because my work still keeps me just as busy.  The time that I usually spent with Matt is now empty.  His new job requires long, long work days and I find myself eating almost every weekday meal alone.  I have to constantly remind myself that this isn’t the first time we’ll be in this place, it isn’t the last, but it is just a season.  That this feeling of loneliness won’t be here forever.

During these seasons of life, I find myself drawing closer to God.  Whether it’s because of the lack of distraction (not that my husband is a distraction, lol!  But tv we watched together sure is!) or just because I feel alone at times, I can’t really be sure.  But it’s without fail that I feel a hunger to be closer to Him.  It’s at times like these that I can’t wait to get my hands on books that will help me deal with where I’m at in my life at that moment.  Authors such as Jen Hatmaker, have a way of putting into words the truths that I so badly need to hear.

This time alone lately has inspired me to share with you ways that I cope with being lonely.  I know I’m extremely blessed.  My current situation being in a foreign city led me to think about my Gorgeous readers.  How many of you have also battled, or may be currently battling, loneliness and trials?  Regardless of where you’re at in life, these are some of tips to help you find joy in your loneliness:

  1.  Maximize my time with my husband.  Try to make it so your time together is special, no chores, no work, just a time to enjoy each other.  If you’re single, this is such a special time in your life to grow closer and connect with God.  I learned more about myself during my periods of singleness because of how much I depended on God during those times.
  2. Find a good girlfriend (or several) who you can confide in and they can do likewise.  My best friend Megan and I used to call each other our “accountability partners”.  That still rings true to this day.  I can count on being able to call her with any situation and knowing that she’s going to speak unbiased truth into my life regardless of how it will make me feel.  I can also do the same for her.  We both know how to talk to each other in a way to get the truth across, but doing so in love.  Girlfriends are so important in every season of life.  Your husband most likely isn’t wired to listen to every detail of your shopping trip, that’s why God gave us girlfriends!  To laugh, to cry, to share with and to walk through life with.
  3. Dive into the Bible.  The Bible has the answer to every question we ask in life.  Reading God’s Word is the most rewarding way to spend your time.  Sometimes I’ll find myself in a situation and out of nowhere I’ll recall a scripture that applies so accurately to what I’m going through.  Scripture and Biblical principle helps me to process and deal with what I’m going through.

A good solid chat with a girlfriend is a surefire way to battle loneliness for me.  One of my favorite ways to spend a girlfriend’s day is attending Christian women’s conferences.  We go together, learn together and grow together in Christ.  We leaving feeling so renewed, so full of joy and hope.  You’re given practical information and life lessons that are shared.  The Belong Tour is now underway and has stops in 12 cities nationwide!  Grab your best girlfriends and make it a girls weekend.  You’ll love the time getting to experience such blessed speakers, authors and musical talent.  One of my favorite musical duo’s, JOHNNYSWIM, will also be performing in select cities!

belong tour angela lanter hello gorgeous

 

Click here to find out more about Belong Tour.  Click here to find out if Belong Tour is coming to a city near you and when you purchase your tickets, you can use the code SWEET1 for a special discount.

I’ve also partnered with the BELONG Tour to give away tickets to an upcoming BELONG event! One lucky winner will win (5) tickets so she can bring four of her friends or family members with her to the event!  Click here to enter!

Photos by Valorie Darling Photography.


Bailey 44 Desert Sunset Dress  //  Stecy Sandals  //  Chateau Drop Earrings  //  Pave Link Bracelet  //  Crystal Hinge Bracelet  //  Accent Ring  //  Jouer Lip Creme

Sizing Info:  Wearing dress in size XS and sandals in US size 7.

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19 comments
  • Candace August 26, 2016 at 12:33 PM

    Hey Angela 🙂 First of all, That dress is so beautifuuul! <3
    Secondly, this blog was perfect timing and right up my ally. When my husband and I moved to Louisiana, we had a really hard time connecting with people, and we still are having a hard time with it. While we were in Ohio during our bible college days, it took those few years to build true, strong friendships with a few people and I'm sad that we ended up moving.
    I do enjoy my alone time and it's especially great to spend time with Jesus 🙂 but it really is a bummer not having a best friend here, and my hubby has really long work hours. Spending time with the Lord is great, and He loves it when we have that extra time to spend with Him 🙂
    Thank you for this post, Angela! <3

    • Angela Lanter August 27, 2016 at 12:19 PM

      Thanks Candace! I’m so glad to hear that this was timed perfectly for you. 🙂

      I know all about making girlfriends in new cities, it ain’t easy! I found that joining women’s small groups, and opening my home to host other ladies, really helped get me acclimated to LA and the girls in my new church. Hoping you find some new buddies! xoxo

  • Erin August 26, 2016 at 2:02 PM

    Hi Angela,
    This post is what I really needed to hear today I have been struggling with loneliness my husband works 12+hours on night shift and every other weekend. We have totally different work schedules so its easy to feel this way. I do like to read uplifting books and my Bible and spend time in extra prayer. I find Proverbs 31:10-31 helps me when I feel down.Do you have any book recommendations for encouragement? I am lucky my family is really close by so I can see them often. Thank you for posting this! God bless you!

    • Angela Lanter August 27, 2016 at 10:10 AM

      Oh, Erin… I feel for ya, girlfriend! It’s hard being away from your best friend so much, and on a regular schedule too!

      I’m currently eyeballs deep into an amazing marriage book that I’m completely obsessed with… I’m thinking about doing a blog post about which marriage books I’ve found helpful and highly recommend. Would that be something you would be interested in reading?

      Also, I just ordered a new Beth Moore study that I haven’t started yet: http://bit.ly/2bI0n1a. I’m hoping it arrives to day so I can dig in! Beth Moore is who I look to for encouragement, or really just leadership and guidance. I admire her so much! I recently downloaded the app, iDisciple, and have loved it! I turn on Beth Moore and listen to her while I work or get chores done around the house. She has such a way with speaking the truth that makes it so easy to understand and apply to my life.

      xoxo

  • Autumn August 26, 2016 at 2:29 PM

    Thank you so much for posting this. It was very inspiring. When my fiance was in Afghanistan for a full year I was having a terrible time dealing with it and did the same as you… read everything I could to help me, found things to pass the time that were uplifting, and spent time on my small business. When he got to come home for leave for two weeks it was such a God send. Spending that time with him was a cherishable moment and something I’ll never forget. I’m so happy that now four years later that he’s home safely and we’ve continued our lives together as a married couple. I wish you and Matt the best in your marriage. You’ve both been an inspiration to me. I’ve followed Matt since 90210 and have enjoyed all of the things he’s been in. I found your You Tube channel through a search for him and have followed you since. You’re such a sweet person and I really enjoy all of your videos. Thank you for being you. Have a wonderful day! ~Autumn

    • Angela Lanter August 27, 2016 at 10:13 AM

      Oh Autumn! I dated Matt long distance for 2 1/2 years, so I understand the emotions that come with being separated. But I can’t even compare dating long distance to your situation… I can’t imagine the anxiety you must have felt for him throughout that year! I’m so glad to hear that he’s home safe and you two are happily married. Married life is the best, isn’t it?! xoxo

      • Autumn August 30, 2016 at 10:10 AM

        It’s definitely the best. I feel so close to him and so humbled that we’re together. He’s my best friend and I love him dearly! I watched your You Tube video when Matt did your makeup and I thought it was the cutest thing ever. It made me think of my husband and I’s relationship. We act very similar and are very playful with one another. 🙂

        Question for you: Do you have any recommendations on books for relationships? Anything is helpful to keep us going strong always. Btw: I bought a few books by Jen Hatmaker and can’t wait for them to come in the mail. They should be here in a few days. I’m so excited!

  • Katie August 26, 2016 at 6:58 PM

    Hi Angela – this is a really wonderful post! Thank you for sharing! When I have moments where I feel lonely or homesick, I like to remind myself that this feeling won’t last forever – it will pass! I also try to cherish the downtime that I have during these times and try a new hobby, workout and go on long walks, read lots of books, and catchup on tv shows or movies. Because I know that once the loneliness passes, I will look back on that time and be grateful that I made the most of it. Also, when I get busy with work and the daily grind, I find myself wishing I could have one of those solitary days to unwind 🙂 Also, I sometimes just have a good cry during those times, and I always feel much better once I’ve let go of those bottled up feelings – that is one thing that I personally do to cope.

    • Angela Lanter August 27, 2016 at 10:15 AM

      Thanks Katie! I love your positive outlook. Sometimes it’s hard to be positive when everything around you just makes you so sad, so I love that you have trained your mind to think positively and refocus your attention. Isn’t it funny that sometimes us girls just need a good cry? There’s something so therapeutic in it at certain points in our lives!

  • Holland August 27, 2016 at 9:39 AM

    Hi Angela,

    This post hits really close to home for me and came at the perfect time! You are such a beautiful person, inside and out. Thank you.

    • Angela Lanter August 27, 2016 at 10:17 AM

      Thanks Holland! I’m so happy that you found this useful. It was a harder post for me to write, being that I chose to be more vulnerable in it. Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment, it makes it feel worthwhile to step outside of my comfort zone when I know it’s positively impacted even just one other woman. 🙂

  • Emma August 27, 2016 at 1:04 PM

    Wow! The Lord knew exactly what I needed. I just came back from the cafeteria at my university and while I was there I had been reflecting on how lonely I was as it just kind of dawned on me that I eat most meals alone. Then I saw this post come up and knew I needed to read it!

    Thanks Angela for letting God work through you! I needed those words in my life and now I feel so much more empowered as I realize I can draw nearer to Him in this time. 🙂

    • Angela Lanter August 29, 2016 at 10:33 AM

      I’m so glad to read this comment, you have no idea! Are you away at school by yourself right now? If so, this is such a transitional time in your life and you will learn so much during this time! I immediately saw Rory Gilmore in my head when I read your comment. 🙂

  • Camille August 27, 2016 at 4:09 PM

    The dress is so lovely. But the post and your heartfelt words were beautiful. Seasons certainly do change and life is made of them. I’m glad you have your faith to help keep you strong and centered. So meaningful for you to share.

  • Lena Borisenko September 9, 2016 at 2:25 PM

    Hi Angela,
    Will you please write a post on your favorite christian books, devotions,and apps? Thank you for your braveness in showing the light and speaking about Him! 🙂

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